Thinking About My Ways

“You look for much, but it turns out to be little. When you bring it home, I blow it away. Why?” says the Lord of All. “Because My house lies waste, while each of you takes care of his own house." Haggai 1:9 NLV

Lord, these words struck me a lot. I thought what I have been doing, what I have decided were the best things to do. They turned out they never were.

I thought that by transferring to a closer church, things would be better and it would be more practical for us. Yet, here we are empty and working on our ways.

Yes, You are right. We have been giving our tithes and offerings but it seems like nothing is happening even if we do it. Because ours is partial obedience.

Lord, I give up. I will go back. We will go back there, together as husband and wife. My husband was happy there though he just did not voice it out to me for the fear that we might fight again. I am sorry Lord if I have been making my husband feel that way.

This is what You said:

"And be strong, all you people of the land,’ says the Lord. ‘Do the work, for I am with you,’ says the Lord of All." Haggai 2:4 NLV

Lord, You know our financial capacity. You know how we lack money sometimes to make both ends meet. But this is what You said. We do the work as we trust You. Help us to trust You and let not our own ways reign.

Lord, help me. Help us. You will provide for us, I know. Lord, just do the miracles. We need it Father. We badly need it Lord.

Lord, I am also going to transfer to another school. To public school. Next school year. Lord, help me to decide if it is the right thing to do. I honestly feel discontentment in the place where I am now. I don't grow anymore. It feels like I am just inside a circle albeit it is getting bigger, still the same. Help me Lord. I am tired of pleasing the parents, of pleasing my superiors, I am tired of those things. I just want to experience new things. Maybe this is really the time for me to get out of my comfort zone.

Just help us Lord. Help me to work in Your house. I want to join a ministry Father. The singing group or in the children'd department. But where will I be more become effective? My voice. This has been put into waste for how many years already. I need to open my voice for You again Lord. I need You Father to help me with this. 

Thank You Lord. Thank You Father. May Your will be done. May my spirit, our spirit, my and my husband's be renewed. Thank You Lord. Amen.